The Scale

18 07 2012


I honest to god have a love hate relationship with my scale. Right now there is a whole lot of hate going on. I don’t weigh myself every day anymore. I used to be completely obsessed with it but now I try to only step on the scale a couple times a week. I judge if it is a weigh in day by how I think my abs look. For instance this morning I took a look and thought that they looked pretty good. Not sure why I felt that way( lol) because I have not done an ab workout in a week or so but perhaps I thought that the ab fairy had paid me a visit in the middle of the night and granted my wish for decent abs.

I went through the regular routine, go to the bathroom, take off all my clothes including my hair elastic because they have to weigh at least an ounce. I stepped on the scale with my eyes closed, took a deep breath and opened my eye lids when approx 3 seconds had gone by. I was amazed and excited. The scale was reporting a number that I was ecstatic about. It meant that I had lost the 7 of the 8 pounds I wanted to lose. Immediately I was thinking about all of the extra choices I had in my wardrobe and how proud I was for not eating that chocolate and turning down Dairy Queen when my daughter asked me if I wanted her to bring me anything back. Then, the worst thing that could ever happen, happened. I looked down at the screen to confirm my great weight loss feat when all of a sudden ERROR flashed on the screen. #@###$$%%, way to burst my bubble

I swear ( and I did in my head a ton at the moment ) neither of my children had better ask me do anything for them in the next hour and my kitchen had better be the way I left it when I went to bed or I will probably lose it. If the weight loss had been a reality my kids could have probably asked me to almost anything and I would have agreed. “What you want to see Niagara Falls? “ Pack your bags we are leaving in an hour”!

I repeated the routine again this time with my blood pressure elevated (does that add weight?) to find that my weight was exactly the same as it was last time had stepped on the scale. There is nothing better to ruin the start of the day than to see that you had not lost any of the weight you so want to magically to melt away. How seriously had I not lost an ounce?? I really have been trying. I have been resisting my candy stash only having one or two of my fav treats instead of the entire box full like I normally would. I do exercises while I brush my teeth and fix my hair. I honestly think about doing a full work out at least 2-3 times a day.

What happened to the days where my clothes didn’t fit properly because I was too small and had to have everything taken in? Oh yes, marriage, pregnancies and turning 40!!. Why does losing weight have to include bending and twisting my body in ways that just aren’t natural? Why in order to burn calories do you have to sweat? I hate feeling all hot and sticky and spend most of my workout thinking about how gross I feel rather than the calories I am burning.

I am always looking for ways to burn extra calories throughout the day so I did a goggle search to see what new ways I could find. I found out that making out with someone for 20 minutes can burn 100 calories, talking on the phone for 55 minutes can burn 50 calories and a brisk walk with your dog for an hour burns 200 calories. Basically this single woman with no dog and friends who want to text rather than talk is screwed.

I have been putting this off as long as I can. I am actually going to get up out of bed and throw in an exercise dvd and work out. If any of my friends want to call me to actually talk on the phone I am busy for the next 16 minutes!!!



4 responses

18 07 2012

I found that having your upper teeth all taken out, getting an artificial plate (that doesn’t fit properly), and continually worrying and being concerned about my children and their families (really none of my business) did wonders for me. But then, it passes the time!!!

19 07 2012
julia emerson

That was very funny…you can borrow my dog anytime..I prefer to text!!!. of course you know you are beautiful!!

19 07 2012

Amazing how a stupid little box can make or ruin our day.

19 07 2012
Heather Irwin

Dont forget to shave your legs AND clean out your belly button before stepping on. 😛 Love your blog!!

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